Week to Week

I enjoy routine so much that I have trouble viewing results in any way other than from week to week. I think Weight Watchers broke my brain because it's just SO IMPORTANT to have your weight go down every single week there. You get sad/angry faces made at you if you don't do that.

It's so hard not to think week to week especially if you're like me and you have that M-F, 9-5 type of job. The week starts with Monday. The weekend is the end of the week. Things happen. We start over again. That's just how it works.

So now that I'm chillin' in my lawn chair on top of this GIGANTIC PLATEAU, week to week is disappointing and irritating. I've started what feels like MONTHS of weeks here and had no changes in my weight. And I'm so freaking close. I've decided 145 is what we're striving for here... and I've been 154 nearly every morning for who knows how long. I'm sure I could take the time to calculate just how long, what with all of the data that I keep on a daily basis to keep myself honest, but frankly, it'd only piss me off more.

I wouldn't say my mind is actively trying to rid myself of this evil, evil plateau, but rather just continue to focus on what I'm supposed to be doing. I've been tracking my food and exercising. Trying not to be over full or over hungry at any given time. Eating to survive. But eating stuff that tastes awesome.

Groceries force me into a week to week viewpoint too. I can't buy food for two weeks because it's probably going to go bad. I hate grocery shopping with every fiber of my being (I won't even go into today with the woman getting the very large money order with the very destructive son when all I wanted was postage stamps, thanks lady) so going more than once a week sounds dreadful. I can't buy an avocado and eat it at the end of the week because they're almost overripe at the time I purchase them anyway. I'm starting to rely a little too much on my freezer.

Last week's lasagna lasted a long time. Had it for lunch. Had it for dinner. Have a feeling I'll be eating it tonight too! (Hopefully my handsome gentleman enjoys what was left in his fridge too!). This week I'm looking forward to making the most of a rotisserie chicken. So many Cooking Light recipes use rotisserie chicken and honestly, it makes SO MUCH sense for me. I hate raw chicken. I hate cooking chicken. If I can just buy it cooked and then use it in things, it's absolutely worth it. And they only run about $4.99 at my grocery which is cheaper than buying a smaller package of raw chicken anyway.

Tomorrow it looks like I'll be making mini chicken and cheese enchiladas and I'll hopefully be making this chicken chili with salsa verde and hominy. Yum!

In an attempt to try to think a little more long term, I've registered for my first 5k!! I'm right now working on week 4 of the “Couch to 5k” program and by the time June 2^nd rolls around, I'll be in the last week of the training. I'm a little nervous about going by myself. But I want to do it by myself. I want to go at my own pace and just look forward to finishing and keeping my own stride.

When I was younger. When I was fatter. I always dreamed of running. I volunteered as a mile timer for a 5k in high school and honestly, I felt like those people were going SO FAST! 8 minute miles? 10 minute miles? I could barely run a block. So now that I weigh less and shorts aren't in my top 5 greatest fears (top 1 greatest fear is damaging my Achilles tendon, just in case you were curious... thanks Pet Semetary) I wanted to give it a try and I did and I have and it's been wonderful. It's definitely not the most pleasant thing while I'm doing it. About half way through my workout I feel like I'm going to throw up and I'm spitting when I breathe and I just hope no one is looking at me... but when I'm finished and I'm stretching and cooling down and even my shins are sweaty, it feels like a real accomplishment and I feel so good.

Rather than viewing things in the span of a week, I'm going to try to think 5 weeks ahead and know that my eating and my working out is all going to get me to participating in something I'd dreamed of doing for far too long.

Who is this girl who makes her own dreams come true?

I know she's done it a few times... but maybe it's starting to feel real now. Took a break from running today to walk in the woods by the lake. There's so many things in my life that I couldn't enjoy because I just wasn't enjoying who I was doing those things with. I used to love hiking. My ex husband and being way too overweight ruined it for me. Doing what I want to do because I want to do it for a change is kind of the best thing ever.

A short aside: I love Pinterest. How did people cook before the internet? No really? How? I saw THIS RECIPE and I got an avocado at the grocery this morning just so I could have it for lunch tomorrow. I wouldn't have thought of that... I wouldn't trust myself to actually cook avocado since they're so delicate.

I use the internet CONSTANTLY while cooking. Measurement conversions for halving recipes. Pictures of food and what to cook. What to use instead of sour cream. What temperature to cook pork tenderloin. I can't imagine how people cooked imaginatively or were successful losing weight before the internet.  Today the internet taught me how to bake eggs instead of boil them!  Not so high maintenance.

Maybe they didn't have to lose weight because they weren't sitting in front of the computer.